Jesus putting rest in my heart

So i talked to johnny today and it put rest in my heart... First jesus says to love love love and i because of christ i have love in my heart : Forgive and love :)

So that night what happend was after taking the shrooms i began hullicnating... THe song train to hell was plying and i began to freak out.. I thought JOhnny was the devil..... I wanted to talk to marc G or Sean downey because i know they know JC. Johnny woudnt let me call cause he wanted to exp[lain the situation to Marc G. First.. Sadly MArc is saved as ISh so this was not an option... I Began to attack Johnny becasue i thought he was robbing me of my salvation... He pinned me down on the ground and i began to yell jesus christ is the savior of my sins...He covered my mouth because i was yelling so loud he did not want to disturb the neighbors.... I hallucinated now and thought he had a knife to me and i had to choose who my god was.... THe hallucinations told me that jesus was not my savior but i held true to my belif.... This meant that the final test which has scarred me so much was who is my savior.... At this point the hallucaiton was trying to trick me to say anything else but jesus.. since JEsus is the savior of my my sins.... he continued to cover my mouth which scared me even more....I was terrified i was going to loose my salvation.... HE enveually just let me sit their and yell since there was nothing that could be done.... The test was was i willing to die for christ? Well of course not... Christ died for me !!! So the final test was showing a knice who did i choose for my salvation -- the world or christ.... I choose christ... shorty after this took place johnny had his friend come over to watch me... HE asked me if i knew tyler but i was non respondent...

Rember that night ..... I was tested 3 times and the answer was always JESUS..... i would go further and rugther down until the final time i see the knife and i have to answer Jesus Christ.... THis is all based off JC ... my haluciation ask me was i willing to die for what i belived ... I chose Jesus .... Right after the second trial i frekaed out even more cause i felt the devil" johnny was trying to trick me". The 3rd one freaked me out so much becasue the knife is as close to my heart as it can get and i must answer jesus... at this point my mouth is compltelly covered and its like i am out of body trying to say jesus to my other self but it cant here..... At this point i dont recall what i said... jesus!!!.....

Also in my dream last night " i was freaked out about me and the 3 things i had to do" In my dream i went back to that moment with johnny and y dream self had past the test but it was very hard".... Then i felt i had to do the same...

SO the things to know... this is all based off me winning my salvation and proclaiming the name of christ.... Well luckly we dont have to do that or earn salvation becasue its a gift given by JESUS... I already have it :) These were hallucinations and completelly lies... I now feel i can move on and enjoy my relaitonship even more with CHrist :) LOVE !

Even the hallucinations in the hosptial were about winning my slavations... its why i would do awana songs and other thigns i was contally fighting for my salvation... You cant win your salvation its a gift :) AMEN!